Well, everyone agrees that 2020 was the worst year since, basically, 2016. And lots of folks expect 2021 to be a much better year, because what could be worse than this one, right?

Predictions are, of course, a mug’s game. No one can know the future, psychic powers do not exist, and the future will always, always, always surprise us.

Nevertheless: Kids, it’s going to get so much worse.

Let’s start off with the obvious. COVID-19 got worse after Thanksgiving, when all the stupid, selfish nihilists had big dinners with lots of people and spread the virus far and wide. It’ll get worse after Christmas, when all the stupid, selfish nihilists had big family gatherings with lots of people and spread the virus far and wide. It’ll get worse again after New Year’s, when all the stupid, selfish nihilists will have big stupid parties with lots of people and spread the virus far and wide.

The vaccines will help, but the stupid, selfish nihilists will insist they don’t want them. Just like they don’t want masks. And they’ll keep spreading the virus far and wide.

We are, unfortunately, living in a society full of deeply stupid people who get all their instructions straight from their Mango Messiah, deeply selfish people who think their convenience and comfort is more important than other people’s lives, deeply nihilistic people who dream of setting the world on fire and dancing in the flames because lolol nothing matters.

What else we got? Kids, terrorism is probably gonna go through the fucking roof.

And we’re not talking about Shadowy Muslims blowing up buildings and shooting up shopping malls. We’re talking about very white, very Christian, very Republican Trump worshipers blowing up buildings and shooting up shopping malls. ‘Cause they ain’t adjusting well to their God-Emperor getting shown the door, and most of them would much rather cast out everything they claimed to believe about the greatness of American democracy, murder innocent people, and live in a full-on fascist dictatorship than deal with the fact that a (depressingly slim) majority of Americans don’t believe Nazis are Very Fine People.

“Well, heck, you’re over-reacting! It’s not like we’ve had a lot of terrorism already! I mean, other than the plot to execute the governor in Michigan. And the bombing in Nashville on Christmas Day. And hordes of Proud Boys, undercover cops, and neo-Nazis running wild and assaulting people every few weeks.”

Honestly, I think they’re just getting warmed up. Here’s this dude who lived through a similarly dumb coup attempt, and he says the terrorist attacks started about four months after everyone thought the nonsense was settled. I suspect America’s conservatives, mostly driven to madness by having to share power with women and brown people, are going to go wild with violence or, for those too sensible to pick up a gun or blow up an elementary school, making excuses for violence.

And the press, addicted to the fat ratings and profits of the tabloid Trump era, will be absolutely overjoyed by it all.

But enough about unimportant national news, right? What about the important stuff? What about comics?!

Heck, I have a really hard time saying much. I haven’t lived within four hours of a decent comic book shop in over four years. I don’t know what the big events are. I never hear anything about comics that are getting the big positive buzz. Sometimes, I’m not even really sure what’s getting published. But it still doesn’t feel good to me.

DC Comics got hit with a sledgehammer this year because AT&T decided they don’t care about comics, only IP. And Marvel’s head honchos are either Trumper loons or racist sock-puppet flatscans — plus their parent company has decided they don’t like the idea of paying royalties to writers. I don’t think any of those make for a healthy company. One willing to starve their comics division to maybe, possibly fund some movies and TV shows, and the other slaved to untrustworthy men and an untrustworthy parent that doesn’t value its creators.

I’m not even very optimistic about the various comics-based movies and TV shows. What I worry about is whether movie audiences decided the Marvel Cinematic Universe’s story was completed with the “Endgame” film — and thus may be unwilling to buy into a new phase of the project with new movies, new characters — but without Iron Man and Captain America, two of the series’ most popular characters.

A lot of the new Marvel movies and TV shows sound pretty interesting — but if the audiences don’t show up for them, can the studio continue to greenlight ’em?

As for DC’s movies — I need to see some more evidence that they’ve abandoned the grimdark dumbness brought on by Zack Snyder.

In both cases, I’m really nervous about the idea of jamming theaters with mountains of superhero movies when we’re not even sure if there’s still an appetite for that much stuff. Overwhelming indifferent audiences seems like a good way to release a bunch of flops and killing off the superhero movie for good.

I’m not a complete pessimist. I think we’ll get COVID-19 under control eventually — maybe by summer, maybe after that. I think the economy will start to claw its way back — but the process will be helped along if the Democrats in the Senate realize they can make some improvements by pushing Mitch McConnell down a flight of stairs. And I think some comics will continue to be very profitable — namely graphic novels aimed at younger readers, including books by Raina Telgemeier, Dav Pilkey, and plenty of others, which generally have sales that make DC and Marvel look like indie publishers.

Still — just because 2020 was bad doesn’t mean 2021 is gonna be a lot better. Y’all be careful out there.

Well, good day, comic book fans! How’s your day going? Mine? Almost no one in my town wears their masks like they’re supposed to, so I’m mostly livid these days!

Granted, some days are better than others. Sometimes I’ll go in the grocery store, and no one will be wearing masks; some days, everyone is. But it’s deeply discouraging that so many people aren’t taking this virus seriously. And that’s going to hurt us all down the line.

We need to be more like our favorite superheroes.

Okay, not all of them. Superman and Wonder Woman don’t wear masks at all. Batman and Captain America wear masks, but the wrong kind. No protection for the mouth, nose, lungs. But plenty of superheroes and even a few villains put their own safety and the safety of their fellow citizens above the need to show off their chins.

We’re not going to be able to list all of them, because even I don’t have that much free time. But we’ll try to hit a nice mix of ’em, okay?

Here are the ones doing the best job with their masks:

Azrael!

Black Panther!

Cassandra Cain!

The Confessor!

Deadpool!

But only when he doesn’t get his mask all ripped up.

Doctor Doom!

Even when it looks like his mouth is open, it’s still covered up by a funky mechanical grill!

Iron Man!

All of his modern armor is sealed, even when it looks like the mouth or eyes are open!

Moon Knight!

The Question!

It may look like bare skin, but it’s still a mask!

Rorschach!

The Golden-Age Sandman, Wesley Dodds!

He’s wearing a freakin’ gas mask!

Sensor Girl!

Spider-Man!

Plus most of the other Spider-heroes — Miles Morales, Gwen Stacy, and plenty of others. But not a number of Spider-Women, who often don’t have full-face masks. And definitely not Venom. My god, he puts his nasty-ass tongue on almost everything!

White Tiger!

The Winter Soldier!

The version in the comics has typically worn a domino mask, but the movie version had his mouth and nose covered. And with that haircut, he’s been avoiding hair salons, too! Nice work, Bucky!

A few points for effort:

Doctor Fate!

The mask appears to be open at the bottom, but shouldn’t be much trouble to cover up better, Doc.

Casey Jones!

Sorry, Casey — hockey masks don’t do a good job at all of keeping mouths safely covered.

Grifter!

Masks that hang from the bottom of the face aren’t effective enough, because air and germs can still make it to the mouth pretty easily.

We’ll cover the next four together.

Blue Beetle!

The Mask!

Mister Miracle!

Steel!

Now seriously, how do these even work?! They’re wearing masks, right? They’re clearly wearing masks. But their mouths are completely uncovered. Right? Or are they covered, and we’re just somehow able to see their mouths? MASKS SHOULD NOT WORK THIS WAY, AND CONTEMPLATING THIS FURTHER IS JUST GOING TO REDUCE MY SANITY SCORE.

And finally:

The Shadow!

Come on, pull it up over your nose, Mr. Cranston.

My people, could I please ask you to be sensible and keep maintaining lockdown procedures wherever possible?

I know that’s not going to be a problem for most of you. Polls show that the overwhelming majority of Americans, on both the right and left, support efforts to reduce the spread of COVID-19, including stay-at-home orders, wearing masks in public, and vast increases in testing.

And I also realize that some folks just don’t have a choice but to go to work. Some businesses are forced to either open, despite the health and financial risks, or close down permanently. And I know many employees can’t just choose to work from home, and if they don’t go to work, they lose their jobs — and they’re barred from collecting unemployment.

But if you’re able to? Stay home. Wash your hands. Limit your trips out in public, and if you have to go out, wear a mask. Get exercise and some outdoor time, but do it safely. Take care of your health and the health of your loved ones.

The estimates say we’ll be dealing with 3,000 deaths a day before long — a 9/11 every damn day, and the politicians and pundits are shrugging it all off. And remember, those are extremely optimistic estimates — they could be a hell of a lot higher, and they could go on for another 18-36 months.

And the jackasses going on TV to tell us we need to just take the punch, let the sick die off, sacrifice the old so the country can be strong? Please remember that these people are spouting explicitly Nazi bullshit, so you should simultaneously ignore what they say and burn their house down, because fuck the Nazis.

I’m terrified about the idea that so many friends and family members are at serious risk from this virus, and I want all of you to do everything you can to avoid it. Please, please, please.

Dang, I haven’t written anything for the blog yet? I’m irretrievably lazy.

I’ve got no reviews ready to go, no interesting comics news I’ve heard of, so I’ll drop back on current events.

Y’all as dang sick of this COVID-19 crap as I am? ‘Cause I’m dang sick of it.

My parents are in the high risk group. My siblings and I are all closer than we want to be to the high risk group. Most of my friends are in the high risk group. And even among folks who aren’t in the high risk group? It’s not like we haven’t seen plenty of young, healthy people getting sick and dying from this damned disease.

And the jackholes who rule us are champing at the bit to sacrifice us all for a few billionaires’ short-term economic gains.

And aside from that, I’ve got nothing particularly important to say — aside from wash your hands, keep up your social distancing, yell at your congressthings.

Okay, I’ll say this: Masks suck. Especially if you wear glasses. Because your breath fogs up your glasses almost immediately. It’s extremely irritating.

Here’s the only way I’ve found to make your glasses fog up less while you’re wearing a mask. Try breathing downward.

How do you breathe downwards? If you were ever in marching band in school, it’s how you play a flute. Angle your lips downwards and blow. Your glasses will still fog up a bit, but much less than they would if you were breathing normally.

So there’s my tiny bit of advice.

Everyone be careful out there. Please stay healthy.

I’m really getting tired of this COVID-19 crap, okay? I’m tired of worrying about getting it. I’m tired of worrying that my family will get it. I’m tired of having everything shut down. I’m tired of no one being tested for the virus. I’m tired of our disease response and everything else run by the incompetent dumpgoblins in the White House.

Wash your hands, dammit! Wash your hands! Do you need a guide on how to do it?

Do you need superhero songs to help you remember?

Do you need Wonder Woman to help you remember?

Do you need Spider-Man to help you remember?

Do you need Ralph Hinkley to help you remember?

Do you need Flash Gordon to help you remember? Do you need Queen to help you remember?

Do you need the Spin Doctors to help you remember?

Do you need heavy metal to help you remember? Will you at least listen to Dethklok?

At long last, has it come to this? Do you need the stylish 1960s jazz stylings of Neal Hefti and the Dynamic Duo to help you remember?

Batman says to wash your hands! BATMAN SAYS TO WASH YOUR HANDS!

(And stay inside, if you’re able to. Don’t hoard needed supplies. Share with your neighbors if they need help. If you’re showing symptoms, call your doctor to get screened — don’t just rush to the hospital first. If your local comics shop or other local merchants have to close because of a lockdown, try to support them through mail or online ordering. And vote out the Republicans!)