Urban Myths #1

Part of Top Cow’s “Pilot Season” promotion, this one is set in a world where the culture and magic of Ancient Greece survived to the present day. All the buildings look like Greek temples, the cops are centaurs, fauns throw frisbees in the park, minotaurs drive beat-up junker pickups. Our protagonist is a private eye named Jack Kaklamanis, but everyone calls him Jack Medusa, because his mom was, um, the Medusa. That means Jack has snakes for hair, and he has to wear a metal mask to keep from turning everyone around him to stone. One of his few allies is his blind, widowed dad, who helps maintain his mask.

So Jack has been hired to track down a missing girl. He petrifies a couple of redneck cyclopes, but is making no real progress in the case — until he realizes that the girl’s father died recently, so she may have decided to make an unauthorized trip to Hades to visit him. So Jack has to travel to the Underworld to retrieve her, and he has to hurry, or they’ll both be trapped there forever…

Verdict: Thumbs up. Jack Medusa is a really entertaining and appealing character, and the Greek setting is simultaneously familiar and alien, so it looks like the kind of place where you’ll always find something interesting.

 

Captain Britain and MI-13 #3

The Skrulls have invaded England and taken control of Avalon, the source of Earth’s magic. Things look hopeless — the normal humans and superheroes in England can’t stand long against the Skrulls, the few heroes and mystical creatures left in Avalon can’t hold out long, no one’s left who’s noble enough to draw Excalibre from the stone, and Pete Wisdom is going to have to turn to the forces of evil to fight the alien hordes. But it turns out that unleashing the evils in Avalon, he’s also empowered Merlin himself to work his magic, which he uses to resurrect a certain recently-deceased superhero.

Verdict: Thumbs up. The whole thing was pretty good (John the Skrull and Faiza Hussain are great fun), but this really earns its marks for the scene with all the British flags being whipped off their flagpoles to form the new body of Cap Britain…

Booster Gold #1,000,000

Well, Booster’s time-traveling has already taken him back to DC’s “Zero Hour” crossover — time for him to visit the distant future of the year 85,271. That’s the date of another crossover called “DC One Million,” set one million months after “Action Comics #1.” Anyway, Booster and Skeets get caught up in a timestorm in the aftermath of Ted Kord returning to the past to be killed, and they end up getting a front row seat for the self-promotional theatrics of a guy named Peter Platinum, who reacts angrily when he sees Booster. Apparently, he decided to take Booster’s previous fame-mongering antics to their ultimate point. They don’t interact together long before Rip Hunter appears in his time sphere to fetch Booster and to confiscate Peter Platinum’s stolen costume and time technology.

After returning to the present, Booster, frustrated by Ted’s death and the constant lectures from Rip, quits and goes back to solo superhero duty. He and Skeets run into the Royal Flush Gang in Las Vegas and is in the process of mopping them up when Green Lantern and Green Arrow arrive to help… and also to accuse him of setting up the Gang’s robbery as publicity for himself. He also get a priority message from Batman, who demands to meet with him. Expecting yet another lecture, he is instead surprised to learn that Bats thinks Booster’s been doing a great job, because he learned that he went time traveling to try to keep Barbara Gordon from being paralyzed. He returns to helping Rip, who rewards him with a new teammate. And we also learn a little unexpected info about Rip Hunter’s family life…

Verdict: Thumbs up. It’s really cool how much fun this series has been. Of course, it’s going to continue, but without Geoff Johns at the helm. Can it continue being cool? Let’s hope so. Speaking of cool, the “DC One Million” gimmick is pretty nifty here — if only they coulda gotten Grant Morrison to write it, like he did for most of the One Million crossovers back in ’98…

Legion of Super-Heroes in the 31st Century #16

First time I’ve picked this one up — it’s the all-ages comic version of the recent “Legion of Super-Heroes” cartoon series. And this one stars a character called “Arm-Fall-Off Boy,” a character who appeared in the original LSH comic back in ’89. His one and only power — he can detach his limbs and use them as clubs. Yeah, whooo. Unsurprisingly, he was rejected for Legion membership. Anyway, this issue focuses on Arm-Fall-Off Boy, or Floyd Belkin, who dreams of membership in the Legion and idolizes Phantom Girl, who he imagines is the most tolerant and least judgemental. However, as is revealed during a battle against a very slimy and see-through monster on an alien planet, Phantom Girl is actually incredibly squeamish about gross and icky stuff, which would certainly include AFO Boy’s detachable arms. However, Floyd still manages to come through when times are tough, defeating a supervillain named Starfinger. But will his feats of derring-do still be enough to get him into the Legion?

Verdict: Thumbs up. Floyd is a really charming and amusing character, and he comes up with some pretty funny ways to use his very limited superpowers. And Starfinger is a really funny character, setting up his evil headquarters in a local department store because he can’t afford a fancy media center like they have in their TV department, and waving enthusiastically at Arm-Fall-Off Boy’s disembodied arm.

If you haven’t heard of Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog, you need to go get acquainted ASAP.

What is it? It’s a musical about a supervillain, written and directed by “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” creator and former “Astonishing X-Men” writer Joss Whedon and his family. It stars Neil Patrick Harris (“Doogie Howser,” “How I Met Your Mother,” “Harold and Kumar,” too many others to mention) as Dr. Horrible, Nathan Fillion (“Firefly” and “Desperate Housewives”) as the heroic but egotistical Captain Hammer, and Felicia Day (“Buffy” and “The Guild“) as Penny, Dr. Horrible’s idealistic love interest.

So what’s the deal? Well, first, it’s very funny, and that should be enough reason all by itself to go watch it. If you enjoyed the musical episode of “Buffy” back in 2001, you should enjoy the music, since Whedon wrote the music and lyrics for both. How much superhero action? Well, not a ton. The budget’s not real grand, so don’t expect too much.

But listen, if you want to see it, you have a limited amount of time to do so. The first episode debuted today, Part II hits this Thursday, and Part III appears on Saturday. And then the whole thing goes offline on Sunday! Of course, it’ll be released on DVD eventually, but this is going to be your only chance to see it for free, so don’t miss out!

Hairless bipeds! You will submit to your simian superior! You will submit to GRODD!

The puny, primitive humans will bow before Earth’s ultimate master! All hail Gorilla Grodd!

There is no state! There is no religion! There is no society! There is only Grodd!

Humanity is an evolutionary dead end! Only Grodd reigns supreme!

The master of Gorilla City is destined to become the master of the world! All hail GRODD!

Duuuude, you tried these bananas? Awwwwwesome.

Humanity will kneel! Kneel before Grodd!

Justice Society of America #17

Gog is roaming Africa, working miracles, making the desert fertile, and winning hundreds of devoted followers. The Justice Society and the Justice League are watching him warily, but even members of the JSA are considering him a global savior. He’s healed Damage’s face, cures Dr. Mid-Nite’s blindness, restores Starman’s sanity, and returns Power Girl to her original home on Earth-2. But we all know he’s really a bad guy, right?

Verdict: Thumbs up. Raising the stakes nicely, setting up some confrontations for the future. But I gotta say, it’s a real slow-moving issue.

Number of the Beast #7

The Paladins and the Authority fight with each other, while the government scrambles a bunch of super-soldiers cloned from the mega-powerful hero/villain named the High. Of course, the two teams eventually realize that they’re on the same side and retreat to the Authority’s extra-dimensional Carrier, but the High clones have figured out how to follow them.

Verdict: Thumbs down. I’ve been enjoying this series, but this was a fairly pointless issue. I hope things pick up for the grand finale.

It was delayed a week for the Fourth of July, but tonight is the final round of the latest edition of Friday Night Fights! You know what this means, right? With any luck, this’ll be the last time Bahlactus goes for an all-black-and-white comics theme. It was no fun having to bleach the color out of everything I scanned for the fightfests, lemme tell you.

So let’s go ahead and get right to it: from this year’s Captain America #34 by Ed Brubaker, Steve Epting, and Butch Guice — the new Captain America and the Black Widow beat the stuffing out of the evil scientists of A.I.M.:

Even in black and white, a beat-down like that’ll make you glad you’re an American.

Hellboy: The Crooked Man #1

Okay, “Hellboy II: The Golden Army” opens in theaters today, so let’s review a new “Hellboy” comic to get in the mood. This story is set back in 1958, with Hellboy going on walkabout in the Appalachian Mountains. He meets up with a guy named Tom Ferrell, who sold his soul to the devil but then chickened out on the deal and took off. Now he’s come back, and he and Hellboy head out to lay the smackdown on the witches, demons, and devil worshippers plaguing the area.

Verdict: Thumbs up. First of all, it’s written by Mike Mignola, who is absolutely aces on pulp horror. And it’s illustrated by Richard Corben, who, as I’ve mentioned recently, is an awesomely slam-bang horror artist. And this story is chock-full of cool horror imagery, from the emptied witch-skin to the defaced Bible to the near-skeletal horse to the evil Crooked Man himself. The only less-than-awesome thing is that Hellboy himself doesn’t have much to do here — he’s mostly asking questions and listening while Tom Ferrell tells him what’s going on. But I trust it won’t be long before he’s hitting demons with that big stone fist…

House of Mystery #3

Well, I don’t have any other new Hellboy or B.P.R.D. comics to review right now, so let’s keep things in the same dark-fantasy genre. Fig, the House’s new permanent resident, tries in vain to escape over the wall that surrounds the property, but it’s no use — she’s one of the five people who can never leave the property unless invited by the ominous coachman who sometimes visits the House. Meanwhile, in the spotlight story, a low-level gangster spins a yarn about a very close shave against some tough mobsters.

Verdict: Thumbs up. The spotlight story is a bit dull, and not at all horror, but the rest of the book is suitably spooky, especially the segment at the end with the coachman and Rina, the last person to be allowed to leave the House. And I gotta say, I’m really digging these covers by Sam Weber — so far, they’ve all been beautiful masterpieces of creepiness, and I entirely approve.

Batman #678

The Club of Villains is stalking Robin and Nightwing and has attacked Alfred, and there’s nothing Batman can do, because Bruce Wayne has been shot full of crystal meth and heroin and is wandering the streets of Gotham unable to remember who he is. His guide is a homeless man who Batman helped an issue or two ago, but who now appears to have unusual abilities of his own. And by the end, there’s the biggest, weirdest change of costumes I think I’ll ever see.

Verdict: Thumbs up, I think. I really do wish it wasn’t necessary to guess at all the obscure comic references Grant Morrison is dropping on us. (All the “Zur-En-Arrh” stuff is a reference to a Batman story from 1958 where Bats traveled to another planet.) But homeless guys who may not be there, evil mimes, Bat-Mite cameos, and wildly drugged-up stream-of-consciousness Bruce Wayne actually ends up going a long way toward making this work.

1985 #2

Toby has run into the Hulk and the Juggernaut — which is a little weird, since where he’s from, both of them are just comic book characters. Of course, no one believes there are real supervillains around, but the bad guys are tired of being cooped up in that old house, so some of them go out to stir up some mayhem.

Verdict: I’m gonna have to give it a thumbs down. The primary problem here is the art — I know I liked it last issue, but that was one or two normal people and a bunch of supervillains in costume. In this issue, we have several costumed villains, but we have a lot more normals — and it’s really hard to tell one normal person from the next. There need to be some sort of clear identifiers to tell everyone apart, even if it’s just some captions here and there…

Astonishing X-Men #25

Warren Ellis and Simone Bianchi take over this series from the departing Joss Whedon and John Cassaday. We lose Shadowcat and Colossus, but get Storm (and a few others to be named later) in return. Everyone has moved into their new HQ in San Francisco and is investigating the mysterious death of a guy who’s a kinda-sorta-not-really-a-mutant. And to discover the truth, the whole team is going to have to travel to Indonesia to visit an unregulated spaceship junkyard.

Verdict: Well, listen, first of all, there are a lot of cool moments in this one. I love Storm’s conversation with Emma Frost about wanting someone around she can argue with. I love the concept of a spaceship graveyard. I’m not as thrilled about the new “We’re kinda wearing street clothes so the cops don’t freak out about superheroes” uniforms. And the idea of Hank McCoy singing blues songs is just a bit weirder than I can handle. And this entire issue is oddly action-free. The dialogue is still darn nice, so I’m gonna give it a thumbs up. But I don’t know if I’ll be picking up any future issues.

Number of the Beast #6

The Paladins and their supervillain foes finally escape from their virtual reality prison after the High “kills” them all within the artificial world. They emerge angry into the Nevada desert and end up taking on the Authority, which should be a pretty short and bloody battle but probably won’t be, so they can keep the Paladins alive…

Verdict: Thumbs up. I’m still enjoying it, but the last two issues will be the deciding factors in whether this entire series is ultimately good or bad…

 

Billy Batson and the Magic of Shazam! #1

Huzzah, a new all-ages book! Sometimes it seems like all-ages books are the best comics Marvel and DC are producing. In this case, it’s a spinoff from last year’s “Shazam!: The Monster Society of Evil” by Jeff Smith, this time written and drawn by Mike Kunkel, best known for his impossibly adorable “Herobear and the Kid” series.

We get a great introduction to our characters — orphaned kid Billy Batson, who can turn into the World’s Mightiest Mortal, Captain Marvel; his sister Mary, who can turn into the World’s Fastest and Most Hyperactive Sister, Mary Marvel; the wizard Shazam, who gives the kids their powers; moody pre-teen Theo Adam, who can’t remember the magic word that will turn him into the World’s Mightiest Villain, Black Adam.

Hijinx galore ensue. Cap and Mary save a circus train, but just barely. Billy changes into Captain Marvel so he can masquerade as his own father so the two orphans can stay in school, and Cap gets a sabotaged wrecking ball under control.

Verdict: Thumbs up. This is really a big winner. The art is just awesome, and the writing is lots of fun, too. The high point is probably Captain Marvel dressed in a suit, sweet-talking his own principal, and trying to get Mary in trouble by claiming she’s a troublemaker. The circus train is also fun. I don’t care if you’re a kid or an adult — you should go read this.

 

Blue Beetle #28

El Paso is being terrorized by a giant green dog-monster, and no one knows where it came from. Well, except for Peacemaker and Dani Garrett, who’ve figured out that Dr. Mephistopheles, a one-time foe of the original Blue Beetle, Dan Garrett, is responsible. When Jaime finally runs into the monster, the battle doesn’t really go the way anyone expected.

Verdict: Thumbs up. I gotta admit that I’m glad that, even with John Rogers no longer writing the book, the foundation he laid down is still letting writers create great stories with these characters.

 

The War that Time Forgot #3

More time-lost soldiers vs. dinosaurs. That’s really about it.

Verdict: Thumbs down. This is a case study on why you shouldn’t pad your miniseries out too much — there’s obviously not enough story here to fill 12 issues, so everything is dragging down so they can stretch out the plot. The only interesting characters left are Enemy Ace and G.I. Robot, and they don’t get much face-time at all…