Let’s run through ’em fast.

Captain Marvel #15

So Carol didn’t die in space. She just lost her memory and is somehow faking her way through everything. A ton of superheroes go to blow up some evil aliens called the Builders, but Carol gets stuck in space all alone, then she turns into Binary. Okay, fine, everything old is new again.

Verdict: Ehh.

FF #11

The FF go back in time to try to rescue the Fantastic Four, but they get hijacked by the Impossible Man, and they agree to take on his son Adolf as a student.

Verdict: Ehh.

The Green Team #4

Everyone fights Riot, who turns out to be Comm’s father. Cecilia loses her cyborg arm, and the nanites in Comm’s suit give him superpowers.

Verdict: Ehh.

Lazarus #3

Forever Carlyle visits the Morray family to offer them a truce. She and Joacquim, the Morray Lazarus get along very well. Jonah and Johanna Carlyle, however, are plotting against everyone.

Verdict: A bit better, but still mostly ehh.

Uncanny Avengers #11

Daken stabs Wolverine through the head, the Sentry tears his own face off, and the Scarlet Witch may be about to rapture every mutant on Earth to another planet.

Verdict: I’m a little amazed how little I care about this comic.

Young Avengers #9

Prodigy’s smooch with Hulkling is just gonna cause more angst. The rest of the team meets Leah, a former handmaiden of Hela banished to another dimension by Loki years ago. The team finally rescues Hulkling and Prodigy from Mother’s dimension by hitting her with a bunch of evil alternates versions of themselves. And Kate Bishop is close enough to her birthday that she’ll end up becoming an adult and joining Mother’s side soon. Plus Hulkling’s new therapist looks familiar…

Verdict: Thumbs up. The only one of these I really enjoyed. Lots of fun, lots of action, plenty of intrigue and mystery and humor and spooky stuff.

I had high hopes for every single comic I got this week, and every single one of them let me down. Here’s the damage.

Batman Inc. #13

The final issue of Grant Morrison’s multi-year Batman epic, this one splits its story between Bruce Wayne, beat like a rented mule and arrested for various crimes, being interrogated by Commissioner Gordon, and Batman’s final duel against Talia, leader of Leviathan. Wayne tells Gordon how the murder of his parents left a hole in his heart and how he filled the hole with… something else. And Talia poisons Batman to get a device that will let her destroy cities with a new kind of energy — only to be betrayed by Jason Todd and killed by… someone else. Can Batman continue on, or is his time over?

Verdict: Thumbs down. This one got a lot of hype, and a lot of people who just knee-jerk loved it. I didn’t think it lived up to the hype. The art’s gorgeous, yes. I was pretty satisfied with Wayne’s talk with Jim Gordon. But the rest of it was predictable and pedestrian. Sorry, I wanted to like it, but I just couldn’t do it.

FF #10

Dr. Doom wants the aged, time-traveled Johnny Storm dead, and he’s ordered the blackmailed Alex Power to commit the crime. So he asks Ahura, Tong, Onome, and Bentley-23 is they know anyone who’s ever killed someone. Sure, says Ahura, let’s go talk to my uncle Maximus. And Maximus plays a game of 20 Questions with them to get them to set him free. Meanwhile, Ant-Man, Medusa, She-Hulk, and Darla Deering, along with Leech and Artie, take Tom Brevoort, Matt Fraction, and Michael Allred on a tour in the microverse that ends with everyone getting stalked by a miniaturized giant tiger.

Verdict: Thumbs down. Comic creators showing up as guest stars in Fantastic Four comics are a long-running tradition — Stan and Jack used to meet the original FF all the time. But this time is just plain uninspired — the creators were completely unneeded. And the bit with the genius kids getting completely played by Maximus was really just not very interesting. Sorry, I wanted to like it, but I just couldn’t do it.

Captain Marvel #14

Again, it’s a crossover with “Avengers Assemble,” so we miss about half the story — but I can’t actually tell the difference this time. Anyway, an old Kree supervillain named Yon-Rogg has it in for Carol Danvers and has a whole bunch of robotic Kree sentries converging on NYC. He’s somehow using the robots and his close proximity to Captain Marvel — and a piece of himself that he’s somehow implanted into her brain, which is what’s been causing all her medical difficulties — to materialize an ancient Kree city, which he’s going to use to crush the Big Apple. So she flies into space and dies to shut down the power source and save the city.

Verdict: Thumbs down. Man, it just made so little sense. And she’s not even going to stay dead a whole issue, ’cause we already know she’ll be back in a month, doing some kind of transformation into her old Binary identity. Sorry, I wanted to like it, but I just couldn’t do it.

Daredevil #29

Nate Hackett, former childhood bully of Matt Murdock, on trial for crimes supposedly committed as a member of the Sons of the Serpent, has just been shot… by the trial judge. He’s a member of the Sons, too, as is the bailiff, the prosecuting attorney, several cops — half the folks in the courthouse are members of the Sons of the Serpent. Can Daredevil save Nate, save the innocent paramedic who’s been picked as the fall guy, save everyone else in the courthouse?

Verdict: Thumbs down. I got closest to liking this one, but it just went past my ability to take seriously. If so many cops, judges, and civil servants were secret members of a racist supervillain conspiracy, Nate and Matt and half the superheroes in New York would’ve been taken out by snipers ages ago. Sorry, I wanted to like it, but I just couldn’t do it.

X-Men #3

While most of the team travels to Budapest pursuing Arkea (in the body of Karima Shapandar), Kitty Pryde stays home to deal with an attack on the Jean Grey School of Higher Learning by Arkea’s drones. Bling ends up doing most of the work — and seems vaguely ominous while doing it, though we have no real idea why. Meanwhile, the team pursuing Arkea tracks her to a hospital, where they’re attacked by a bunch of cyber-enhanced patients who’ve been possessed by Arkea. They somehow bluff their way into a victory and even get Karima back alive and more-or-less intact mentally.

Verdict: Thumbs down. I loved the art, but the rest of it? It was all just too abrupt. Fighting against an enemy who scared the crap out of Sublime, who planned to kill every living creature on the planet, and they run her off so quickly, with such a small team? It was too anticlimactic. Sorry, I wanted to like it, but I just couldn’t do it.

Today’s Cool Links:

• Kelly Sue DeConnick has some advice for you aspiring comics creators out there.
• Michelle Rodriguez and other actresses make the point: When entertainment sucks, all of us should work to make entertainment that doesn’t suck.
• A superhero in a burka? Is this a problem? (Truth to tell: No, I really don’t think so.)
• Here’s an interesting article/discussion on what makes a superhero.
• It’s Tales of Metropolis, starring Lois Lane!
• Pen-and-paper RPGs may be getting more popular, even with electronic games to compete with.
• Please enjoy ALL THE ACTION TRAILERS!

Batwoman #21

This might be the first issue of this series that includes less-than-beautiful artwork — but it’s still absolutely perfect for the story being told.

Our focal character is Killer Croc, most recently seen transmogrified into the Hydra by Medusa’s magic. After the defeat of the Medusa, he was taken in by the were-creatures of the Church of Crime, slowly recovered, and took a lover, a snake woman named Claire. After the death of Abbot, the Church wants a new leader, and they’ve decided the Croc can be their king if he kills Batwoman. Is the most brutish of Batman’s foes smart enough to kill Kate Kane?

Verdict: Thumbs up. I really loved the focus on Croc, and the characterization that has him mostly as a bruiser, but with unexpected depths of emotion and intelligence. The art by Francesco Francavilla is rougher than we’ve come to expect from this series — but Killer Croc is also a great deal rougher than our usual protagonists. It works out very well.

Captain Marvel #13

Well, this is going to end up getting awkward. This series is crossing over with “Avengers Assemble” as Carol Danvers tries to figure out who’s behind the attacks on her and what’s causing her strange brain disease. So we’re only getting half the story, unfortunately.

One of Carol’s old enemies, a Kree villain called Yon-Rogg is back, but Carol doesn’t know it. In an attempt to kill her, he’s activated a bunch of robotic Kree Sentries all over the planet. While she, her friends, and some of the Avengers, including Spider-Woman and Bruce Banner, try to brainstorm solutions to the various problems, the Sentries start roaming around and tearing stuff up, while the rest of the Avengers try to keep everything under control.

Verdict: Thumbs down. I just hate these crossovers. They never seem to make a lick of sense. And artwise, this series is still in trouble. The artwork has definitely improved with Scott Hepburn and Gerardo Sandoval working the pencils — but it’s still way, way below the quality that this series deserves. Once again, is Marvel trying to kill off this series with sub-par artwork?

Batwoman #19

Most of this issue is basically a lead-up to the next major storyarc, all revolving around a strong theme of family strife and secrets. DEO agent Cameron Chase clashes with her sister about their superhero-wannabe father. Jacob Kane and his wife argue about his training Kate and Bette as crimefighters. Bette and Kate argue about Batwoman working for the DEO. And Director Bones tries to insist that Batwoman investigate Batman.

Verdict: Thumbs up. Great artwork from beginning to end. How many times do I have to say it? This comic has the best art of any book on the stands. We also get some really enjoyable interpersonal characterization in here. I am really looking forward to seeing how the next few issues progress, ’cause it looks like there are some serious fireworks ahead.

Captain Marvel #12

Carol Danvers spends the whole issue trying to beat up Deathbird without flying, while her doctors discuss her case, the weird lesion in her brain, and her connection to Helen Cobb.

Verdict: Thumbs down. Really, the story is basically fine. But again, the art by Filipe Andrade is shockingly, embarrassingly bad. When you’ve got a comic with really good writing and a lead character who seems to be growing more popular with every appearance, when you’ve got outstanding cover art on every issue, why on earth would you stick it with art this horrific on the inside?

Owls of the Ironwork Isle #1

Lubbock’s Will Terrell provides the art for this new comic miniseries from Antarctic Press, while Stephen Phillips handles the writing chores.

The story is set in a steampunk version of London and focuses on Lady Penelope Ayre, a leader of the Owls, a covert team of guardians, super-spies, and thieves dedicated to protecting the city from all possible threats. For all her responsibility, however, Penelope would very much like the occasional opportunity to enjoy the privileges of high society — but she’s usually required to fulfill her duties to London, the aristocracy, and the Owls. But tonight, Queen Victoria is announcing that new technologies will allow the cream of London society to take up a permanent place above the underclass — namely, as a floating city over everyone else. But a deeply inconvenient murder and a conspiracy in high places has the potential to bring everything crashing to earth.

Verdict: Thumbs up. The story is plenty of fun. The action is nice, and the dialogue is pretty good, too. Loved the characterization, as well — we had quite a few different characters, and they all spoke with their own unique voices. And if y’all are familiar with Will’s art (and for cryin’ out loud, you ought to be), you’ll find the artwork here plays straight into some of his strengths — excellent character design and caricature, strong cartooning, wonderfully expressive facial expressions, great storytelling and action flow. Let’s just put it down here — I loved this — and I’m not often a person with much affinity for steampunk — and you ought to try to pick it up.

Captain Marvel #11

Yet another issue of this comic that suckers you in with beautiful cover art, then stabs you in the back with horrifically bad interior art, courtesy of Filipe Andrade, who apparently has some really amazing blackmail photos of Marvel execs.

So Carol Danvers isn’t allowed to fly because she’s got some sort of bizarre mass in her brain that reacts to her flight powers by moving deeper into her brain and putting herself at risk of a brain hemorrhage — which she’d be able to survive, but without any of her memories or personality. Private eye Dakota North gets her a flying motorcycle and helps her bust up some bad guys, but Carol knows that the mysterious new Deathbird is stalking her… and her friends. How can Captain Marvel stop a flying villain when she’s not allowed to fly?

Verdict: I’m going to give it a thumbs up, because the writing and story are genuinely excellent. But the artwork — man, I’m starting to get the impression that Marvel wants this comic to fail. People get unhappy when you bait-and-switch them with gorgeous covers and gruesome interior art, and a comic this good deserves great art both outside and inside.

Womanthology: Space #5

All of this stories in this issue — the last one of this particular series, though I wouldn’t be surprised to see more on the way soon — are on a broad, common theme: not just stories related to space, but stories about comets. We get a story about an unsually tall girl who loves to run by Barbara Randall Kesel, Diana Nock, and Amauri Osorio; a tale about a robot who installs itself into a voiceless human body to visit the performer he loves by Allison Pang, Chrissie Zullo, and Amauri Osorio; a story about a couple of nogoodniks in 1666 who set out to steal some brandy by Laura Morley, Sara Richard, and Amauri Osorio; a mythological take on the formation of comets by Cecil Castellucci, Kel McDonald, and Amauri Osorio; and a futuristic dystopian story in which a comet’s coming is believed to be a sign of God’s disfavor by Kiala Kazebee and Isabelle Melancon.

Verdict: Thumbs up. Quite aside from the fact that all the stories are excellently written and excellently illustrated, I just want to say that I loved the way the comet theme was used in this issue. You had someone who dressed up as a comet, Halley’s Comet as a background element of a story, an allegorical story about comets, and even a well-known performing artist who takes a tumble out of a dirigible — a falling star. That broad theme gives all the creators an opportunity to create a very wide variety of fun stories.

Captain Marvel #10

Carol Danvers has been diagnosed with some sort of ailment and ordered by her doctor to stop flying — no flying planes, and no flying with superpowers either. I don’t know why there’s a medical connection between the two, really — is the ailment related to how high she goes? Beats me, and no one bothers to question the whole thing. At any rate, Captain Marvel thinks the whole thing is a load of hooey, so she does a little flying. She manages to save a subway car trapped in a sinkhole, but she has some odd blackouts. Plus she’s being stalked by an old enemy called Deathbird. Can Captain Marvel deal with a foe who knows she’s getting weaker? And what will be the ultimate cost of her decision to keep flying?

Verdict: Thumbs up, but just barely, and only because the story was not 100% idiocy. I could’ve dealt with the silliness of the story just fine if it weren’t for the problem of the abysmally bad artwork by Filipe Andrade. I don’t know what kind of blackmail material he’s got on Marvel, but it must be pretty spicy. Really, this comic may be the only one I know of where the interior art is always in a style that’s entirely different than the (completely gorgeous) art on the covers.

Batgirl #16

Well, the Joker wants to marry Batgirl, and he’s got a horde of henchmen holding guns on her to make sure she goes through with the ceremony. But once he pulls out a chainsaw and announces his plan to cut off her arms and legs, she thinks better of it and starts trashing his lackeys. And then James Gordon, Jr., Barbara’s psychotic brother, shows up, brandishes some hand grenades, and tells Batgirl that he’s already freed her mom. That leaves Batgirl free to really cut loose on the bad guys. Will she be able to keep herself from killing the Joker? Or is she about to get hit with a double-dose of betrayal?

Verdict: Thumbs up. Excellent action, drama, suspense, characterization, so very many double-crosses, and a completely nerve-wracking cliffhanger. Is it any wonder why Gail Simone is DC’s most popular writer?

Freelancers #3

Val and Cass have discovered that the kung-fu orphanage where they grew up, the House of Little Fortunes, has been taken over by the unscrupulous Drachmann and their rival Katherine Rushmore, who’ve turned it into a fast-track ninja factory. Our heroes are outmatched — until Drachmann raises the stakes by telling them what happened to their old sensei…

Verdict: Thumbs up. The action is really good. The humor is really good. It may be a bit predictable, but to be honest, I didn’t mind too much. It’s a kung-fu epic — one does not expect the old sensei to make it to the final reel.

Captain Marvel #9

It’s a very, very busy day for Carol Danvers — and most of it involves perfectly mundane chores. At least until a crisis with dinosaurs on the loose derails her To-Do list, forcing her to reschedule everything…

Verdict: Thumbs down. I guess it’s a kinda cute “Day in the Life” story, but it’s really just a bit too mundane. And worse than that is the art. Ye gods, the artwork is horrific. I haven’t seen art this bad in a mainstream comic from the Big Two in a very, very long time. Bad form, Marvel.

Captain Marvel #6

Carol Danvers is still traveling through time, now with her old idol Helen Cobb reluctantly tagging along. And they’ve just arrived at the event where a battle between a Kree supervillain and the original Mar-Vell ends up giving Carol her own superpowers. Will Helen end up stealing Carol’s powers and taking her place?

Verdict: Thumbs up. Good action, good dialogue, and some seriously freaky time-travel stuff. This is just a grand series — I hope you’re enjoying it as much as I am.

Happy #2

Former cop and current hitman Nick Sax is drugged and trapped in a mob hospital while a crew of sadistic torturers close in on him — and his only ally is a tiny blue cartoon pegasus named Happy, the imaginary friend of a little girl who’s been kidnapped by a serial killer. Happy wants Nick to help rescue Hailey, but Nick doesn’t do any favors for anyone, and even Happy’s help during a high-stakes poker game may not convince Nick to help out.

Verdict: Thumbs up. A thoroughly bizarre series so far — part hard-boiled crime thriller, part — well, something with a little blue horsie in it. I don’t really know how to classify it, but it’s good violentastic fun.

Batgirl Annual #1

So we get a big teamup with Batgirl and Catwoman. Selina helps the female Talon from an earlier Batgirl story escape from jail and makes friends with her when she learns she has no family and no friends of her own. When Catwoman delivers her to what’s left of the Court of Owls, they order the cat burglar executed, but Batgirl comes to the rescue. But can either of them handle fighting off not just one, but another half-dozen of the near-unstoppable Talons?

Verdict: Thumbs up. Excellent action and dialogue. Gail Simone loves writing about female heroes, and she manages to fit three absolutely awesome ones in this story. Heck, if Catwoman had been written like this instead of Judd Winick’s useless sexpot, that comic would’ve been more worth reading.

Today’s Cool Links:

• This may be the best Family Circus cartoon ever. Heck, it may be the most purely HEAVY METAL comic strip ever.
• I love movie mashups. Here’s one with every film from the IMDB’s Top 250 movies list.
• This article — about the reporter’s close call with a serial killer 20 years ago — is incredibly powerful storytelling.

Yeah, I’m super-late with reviews, and I just don’t care. After cutting my pull-list in more than half, I ended up getting just four comics — the fewest I’ve picked up in months. And they were all pretty darn good. So, very quickly, let’s look at what we got.

Axe Cop: President of the World #2

It would be impossible for me to describe what goes on here. But there are giant robots, a giant gorilla, an attempt to stab God in the heart with Seattle’s Space Needle, a robot mustache, and a chee-rex, which is a cross between a cheetah and a T-rex.

Verdict: Thumbs up. Wonderfully mad, as expected. And by all means, let’s take a moment to praise the artwork by Ethan Nicolle (That’s the older brother in the team) — everything he does always looks awesome, and I can’t imagine anyone else who could draw a chee-rex so completely perfectly.

The Goon #41

Most of the story focuses on the disgraced Zombie Priest, trying to build himself back up to a position of power by doing magic for others — always supposedly in their favor, but it always turns out bad for everyone. And the second part of the story features a deranged bog lurk with a mad-on for knocking the Goon’s head off.

Verdict: Thumbs up. Nice to see the Zombie Priest returning to become a major threat. And the seriousness of the first story is nicely offset by the wonderful goofiness of the second one.

Captain Marvel #3

Carol Danvers is stuck on an island near Peru during World War II, defending a small all-female squad of Allied saboteurs against Japanese soldiers armed with Kree war machines. And while she can handle one of the alien mega-tanks, is she going to be able to survive a horde of them?

Verdict: Thumbs up. Good fun, nice art, and a few extras that help make it a really entertaining story.

American Vampire #30

Henry Preston is still gravely injured after an attack by vampires, and his wife Pearl and Skinner Sweet hunt the vampires hiding out in Hollywood. They get ambushed by a bunch of vamps just as Henry starts to recover — and just as another terrible twist drives itself into Henry’s and Pearl’s lives.

Verdict: Thumbs up. The action is pretty good, but the emotional whammy of the story, from the beginning all the way to the end, is what really sells this one. It’s an incredible piece of storytelling.

Today’s Cool Links:

• Sign a petition to help save City of Heroes!
• There’s a lot about Mark Millar’s writing that I don’t like at all. But he’s absolutely on the side of the angels here.
• Behold the power of the Dog Side of the Force!
• And here’s some grownups doing a great job of acting out funny stories from kids.

Captain Marvel #2

Carol Danvers is going to take a vintage plane once owned by her idol, a butt-kicking pioneer female pilot named Helen Cobb, up into the air in an attempt to both prove that the plane was sturdy enough to set the altitude record Cobb claimed but could never confirm, and to try to do her idol one better by breaking her record. Unfortunately, something goes wrong, and Carol ends up thrown back in time to World War II. Can she find a way home without upsetting the course of history?

Verdict: Thumbs up. Good writing and art, nice action, dialogue, you name it. I’ve got high hopes for this book.

Batwoman #12

Batwoman and Abbot, the cultist werewolf who has teamed up with her a few times in the past, go on the hunt for Bloody Mary. They visit a house of mirrors and watch Mary’s origin story — a girl forced to marry an older man, she went mad when he was unfaithful and killed as many attractive girls as she could, only to end up hanged and then haunting mirrors for eternity. When Mary finally appears, Batwoman shatters her mirror and interrogates her about where Maro took the children he’d kidnapped, and who runs Medusa. But Mary tells them that Medusa isn’t a criminal organization — she’s a monster out of myth. Not feeling up to taking on a mythological monster, Batwoman and the D.E.O decide she’ll need to team up with someone who knows how to deal with mythology: Wonder Woman. Meanwhile, Bette Kane’s road to recovery begins, and Kate Kane’s relationship with Maggie Sawyer hits the rocks.

Verdict: Thumbs up. Outstanding art and writing. It’s a blast getting to see Bloody Mary again. I do wish we could spend more than just two or three pages per issue with Jacob Kane and Bette Kane. And I’m looking forward to seeing how Batwoman and Wonder Woman end up (not) getting along…

Today’s Cool Links:

• Harry Harrison, creator of the Stainless Steel Rat and the mind behind “Soylent Green,” has died.
• Jamal Igle has started a Kickstarter project for a cool girl-friendly comic. Would ya consider sending him some scratch to help him along?
• The winners of the annual Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest have been announced!