It’s been another rough week, with a few notable highlights, but dangit, the fact remains, there’s no better cure for a rough week than a little FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

Tonight’s mighty battle comes courtesy of July 2003’s Exiles #27 by Chuck Austen, Clayton Henry, and Mark Morales, in which an alternate-reality Colossus reminds alternate-reality Luke Cage about the limits of bulletproof skin.

(Spacebooger don’t pull no punches either.)

Got the car back. Another $350 bucks down the tubes. And actually, I gotta take it to another joint later today for a more minor procedure, but still, here goes another few hours without the car, and another few bucks into the abyss. And on top of all that, I got another couple of job rejections yesterday. So this is what my life is like these days — shovel a few hundred bucks out the window, get turned down for jobs, read the news about another half-million people losing their jobs, and try to find something new to distract myself from thinking about how awful things are.

Luckily, new comics = awesome distraction factor!

Birds of Prey #126

First of all, could I just say that I do not like DC’s “Faces of Evil” covers? Something a tad more colorful, por favor?

Anyway, it’s the next to the last issue of this series. The dastardly but extraordinarily nerdy Calculator has gotten on the bad side of the Kilg%re, a living computer program who’s allied with the Silicon Syndicate. Basically, the Calculator blundered and gave Oracle access to the Syndicate’s secret Internet — the Syndicate is unhappy, but is going to give him three days to kill the Birds of Prey before they kill him. Can Calculator figure out a way to come out on top? Well, yeah, that and more. And with Calc’s newfound power, do Oracle and the rest of the Birds stand any chance against him?

Verdict: Thumbs up. Nice focus on the Calculator and the Syndicate, and Calc’s scheme is enjoyably baroque and twisted.

Green Lantern #37

Hal Jordan and the lone two Blue Lanterns are racing to save Sinestro from being executed by the Red Lanterns. The Blue Lanterns want to save Sinestro — Jordan would kinda like to kill him himself. But he gets ambushed by the blood-barfing Red Lanterns and imprisoned with Sinestro. The demonic Atrocitus pronounces prophecies that Hal will eventually rebel against the Corps, but the Sinestro Corps soon attacks, and Hal finds himself in the crossfire between the Red, Blue, and Yellow Lanterns. Hal tries to save Laira, a former Green Lantern turned Red, but Sinestro kills her. Jordan is enraged by her death — and you know how much the Red Lanterns love rage…

Verdict: I think I’m gonna thumbs-down on this one. I’m really tired of the blood-vomiting Red Lanterns. And I’m not that fond of the Blue Lanterns either. And now that Hal has gone from a Green Lantern to a Red Lantern, with the Blues wanting him as their leader… Hey, do ya reckon, Hal is going to be wearing all seven of the power rings by the time this is all over? Aw, gee, did I figure out the big surprise already?

Secret Six #5

The horrific Junior is going to kill Bane by throwing bricks at him. Five hundred bricks. But Bane is not without resources — namely, that even chained up and seemingly helpless, he’s really, really good at killing Junior’s henchmen. Meanwhile, Jeanette, the Last Victim and the owner of the Nocturne casino, forces Cheshire to give the rest of the Six the antidote to the poisons they were exposed to last issue. Then they all beat the snot out of the supervillains stalking them through the casino. Finally, they go to find Bane, and we get the revelation of Junior’s identity.

Verdict: Thumbs up. Good stuff going on with Bane, and I really do like Jeanette. Not sure how thrilled I am with Junior’s true identity — I kinda liked the character as a shrouded and mysterious creep. Also, the actual disrobing part of it probably requires brain bleach, which I can no longer afford…

I completely forgot that Oscar nominations happened today. The big news for us comic geeks is that Heath Ledger received a nomination for Best Supporting Actor for his role as the Joker in “The Dark Knight.” He’s competing against Josh Brolin in “Milk,” Michael Shannon in “Revolutionary Road,” Philip Seymour Hoffman in “Doubt,” and Robert Downey Jr. in “Tropic Thunder.”

If we’re handicapping things, Ledger looks like he has a pretty good shot at the Oscar — pretty much everyone was talking about what an awesome job he did as the Joker, so he definitely starts out with the most buzz. On the other hand, it’s far from a sure thing — the Oscar voters really love Philip Seymour Hoffman, because I don’t think he’s ever turned in a bad performance. And Josh Brolin got really stellar reviews for “Milk.”

I’m a little boggled that Robert Downey Jr. got nominated for “Tropic Thunder” — Oscar voters generally seem to hate comedies, especially very silly comedies like “Tropic Thunder.” Hey, didn’t that guy also play a comic book character last year?

I generally enjoy the nominations more than the actual Academy Awards — primarily, there are fewer dance numbers. You get a much better overview of what the best movies and performances really were. As far as the other noms go, I’m stoked that Melissa Leo, who played one of my favorite characters on “Homicide: Life on the Street,” got a Best Actress nod for “Frozen River,” that Mickey Rourke got a Best Actor nomination for “The Wrestler,” and that “WALL-E” is a shoe-in for the Best Animated Feature. (But it shoulda got a Best Picture nomination. They coulda put it in place of “Benjamin Button.” I’ve been anti-“Benjamin Button” ever since the trailers, which made me want to projectile vomit directly in Brad Pitt’s face. Yes, I realize the movie is probably perfectly nice, but dangit, those trailers were entirely awful.)

So whatcha think? Is Ledger the likely winner? What are your other Oscar picks? And how much should David Fincher be apologizing to me personally for those barf-worthy trailers?

Had a very interesting day yesterday. I went running a few vital errands around town — mailing job applications (Yeahhh, like anyone in Austin is actually going to hire a Lubbockite for anything?), returning a defective video card back to the manufacturer, and desperately searching for Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr Pepper. I was heading over for a quick visit to Awesome Books when, well, the car went kaput on me. Luckily, I was near my favorite garage, so I was able to limp the car over to them in time. Sometimes, it does seem like the universe is saying, “Hey, look, a jobless guy. Let’s make all his money go away!” Yeah, well, watch it, universe, or I’ll cut ya.

Anyway, the day was salvaged by my brother, who came and picked me up from the garage and took me around town for a few of his errands. We grabbed some sodas, had a right giggle at the “bargains” at Circuit City, and ended up standing in Barnes and Noble for at least half-an-hour jawboning about great science fiction, fantasy, and horror books with a guy we just ran into there. Now usually, this is a prescription for pain — someone you don’t know just starts talking to you in the bookstore about sci-fi, and it’s usually “Heh heh, I love this book ’cause it’s got a vampire lady, and she has big boobs, and there’s some heh heh heh.”

Didn’t happen this time — the guy had read almost everything, knew what the good stuff was, knew how to articulate what he liked about it. We talked about Terry Pratchett, Alice Sheldon, Neil Gaiman, Robert E. Howard, Harlan Ellison, Owl Goingback, Richard Matheson, Hammer Films, Charlaine Harris, Andrew Vachss, Joe R. Lansdale, George R.R. Martin, Christopher Moore, ’70s exploitation horror flicks, and many, many more. As most of y’all are doubtless very well aware, there is nothing that science fiction fans love more than getting to hang out with other science fiction fans — especially smart science fiction fans — and let your geek flag fly. My bro and I had so much fun, we’da put the guy on our Christmas card list if we’d thought to ask him what his name was.

Aaaaanyway, enough about my day. How was yours?

Supergirl: Cosmic Adventures in the 8th Grade #2

Supergirl’s life continues to be generally sucky, including having to stay late after school, getting exposed to Kryptonite, and getting a superpowered imperfect-clone rival named Belinda Zee, but she does at least meet her first real friend, a red-headed genius named Lena Thorul. Umm, why do I suspect that last name would scramble into something ominous?

Verdict: Thumbs up. I would’ve enjoyed this one anyway, but any comic that includes the line “Must… fight crime… Save… cow!” is definitely a winner.

Terra #4

The final issue of this miniseries has Terra and Geo-Force work to stop the rampage of the maddened crystal-powered Richard What’s-His-Name. All that, plus another guest-appearance from Power Girl, clothes-shopping, and spitting out sushi. It makes more sense in context, trust me.

Verdict: Thumbs up. Again, I just love Amanda Conner’s artwork. I hope she’s working on some new comics coming out? Oooh, what’s that? Conner, Palmiotti, and Gray are working on a new “Power Girl” ongoing series? Wonderful!

All told, it’s looking like it’s gonna be a pretty good day for Barack Obama, what with taking the oath of office and becoming the President of the United States and all that.

I was digging through my archives the other day and realized that, though there have been a lot of presidential guest-appearances in comics over the past few decades, there have been mighty few who were showing up in comics before their inaugurations.

After all, Obama starred in a nonfictional biography comic:

He teamed up with Spider-Man:

(Of course, who hasn’t teamed up with Spider-Man. I think Frog-Man has had more guest-appearances with Spidey than Obama has. Kinda takes the polish off that little honor…)

Obama has made more than one appearance with the Savage Dragon:

And he even got his photo snapped with the Man of Steel:

If there’s a downside to all this attention the comics world has been paying him, it’s gotta be this:

Yeah, Barack Obama is going to get drawn by talentless crapmonkey Rob Liefeld. I don’t think I’d wish a fate that horrible on anyone…

Captain Britain and MI:13 #9

The demonic Plotka has trapped the team in a netherworld, thanks to the treachery of Captain Midlands, and he’s going to use them as a power source to create more Mindless Ones and take over the planet. The team’s science advisor actually climbs inside a captured Mindless One to get to the dimension-lost Captain Britain and lead him to safety… but it turns out Cap’s late wife Meggan may actually really be alive again. Meanwhile, the rest of the team captures Captain Midlands, shatters his fantasy of his beloved wife, and uses the Black Knight’s sword to cut through the “Dream Corridor” and free all the imprisoned souls. But can the team still manage to stop Plotka in time?

Verdict: Thumbs up. Great action going on here. I loved the aftermath — awww, Blade and Spitfire are gonna be friends after all! And even better — next issue: Dracula!

War of Kings Saga

It’s a free comic! Designed as a promotion for Marvel’s upcoming “War of Kings” crossover event, this is a history of the Inhumans and everyone connected to them, including Quicksilver, the Starjammers, the Shi’ar Empire, Havok, and many more.

Verdict: I was going to give this a thumbs down, ’cause I can’t summon any interest in “War of Kings” — but it is free, and it’s a pretty good resource for the very convoluted history of the Inhumans. So it’s a thumbs up.

Another dreary week in another dreary month. Keeps going on an on and on like a poison. You want the antidote? Then step up for 500cc’s of FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

These don’t always have to be complicated ballets of violence and pain. Sometimes, all you need is a single panel from February 1998’s New Year’s Evil: Body Doubles #1 by Dan Abnett, Andy Lanning, Joe Phillips, and Jasen Rodriguez, as Carmen Leno plays knuckle-hockey with the bridge of Merlyn’s nose.

If that don’t get you ready for the weekend, you got worse problems than I can fix…

UPDATE: How embarrassing! Crisis on Earth-Prime spotlighted the same fight as I did! That’s like showing up at the dance wearing the same dress as someone else! Um, I mean, that’s what I hear! Not that I’d know first-hand or anything…

There were a couple of different comics that I didn’t pick up this week. Actually, I didn’t even get a chance to get them — they weren’t in the store when I made it in. Could be because they were already sold out. Could be because they weren’t included in this week’s shipment — something that happens quite a lot. Still, even if they’d been available, I don’t think I would’ve bought them. But let’s talk about them a bit anyway.

The Amazing Spider-Man #583

Yeah, the issue where soon-to-be President Barack Obama does the terrorist fist jab with Spider-Man. I’d already heard from a friend who’d seen the comic earlier that he didn’t think it was a very good story, and I was already leery of this being something I’d buy, read, find boring, and want to get rid of ASAP. So it wasn’t appealing to me at all. Just another publicity stunt by Marvel, though by all accounts, it’s been an uncommonly successful publicity stunt — Marvel’s gone back for three printings already to keep up with the demand.

Final Crisis #6

Well, like I’d said previously, I’m quitting the crossovers, especially the crossovers that are $4 instead of $3. I’ve already heard that Grant Morrison finally delivers what he said he’d have in the “Batman R.I.P.” storyarc — the death of Batman. He gets zapped by Darkseid’s “Omega Effect” right after shooting him in the shoulder with a big gun. Way to go, Bats, you actually use a gun on someone, on the biggest, baddest villain in the DCU, a guy who’s planning on killing, well, everyone, and you still can’t shoot him in the head. Great work, man.

Also, please feel free to gasp in wonder at the stunning and humiliating depths of ineptitude displayed by DC’s public relations office. You’re part of a gigantic media megalith like Warner Brothers. You’ve just “killed” the most popular superhero in the world. And you can’t even get a mention on the news because everyone’s talking about Marvel’s publicity stunt with Barack Obama. Congratulations, DC Comics, you are officially the Gang that Couldn’t Shoot Straight.

And in a related topic, could I direct y’all’s attention to this silliness over at Valerie D’Orazio’s joint, referring to the new issue of “Final Crisis”?

This book comes out the same day as the Spider-Man Obama cover. Such a contrast in energy, direction.

I choose hope.

Puhhh-lease. The death of Batman and the guest-appearance of Obama have exactly the same goals: sales. In fact, the energy and direction of both events is blatantly, unashamedly cynical — fake events, publicity-seeking nothingness, and short-term sales boosts. Will Batman stay dead? Certainly not. Did Obama’s appearance serve any greater story? Certainly not. Both events are there only because the publishers believe that readers will buy into the hype and buy the comics.

If anything, I think the Spider-Man comic may actually be more cynical. Marvel head-honcho Joe Quesada has said they published the story only because they found out that Obama is a Spidey fan. It’s the equivalent of a commemorative plate. I don’t blame Marvel for publishing it — if I was in charge of the company, I’d be nuts not to hook my wagon to an incredibly popular president-elect. But let’s not ascribe unearned nobility to what is simply a fairly shrewd PR ploy.

Oh, and one more thing, ’cause I just can’t let this go yet. As far as all the “hope” at Marvel, and the “contrast in energy, direction” between Marvel and DC — in the past few years, Marvel has killed off Captain America, the Wasp, and Kitty Pryde, and had Spider-Man make a deal with the Devil to end his marriage. It takes more than a back-up story guest-starring a popular politician to erase years of cynical storytelling. The contrast between Marvel and DC is nil.

Blue Beetle #34

Uh-oh, Dr. Polaris has killed Blue Beetle! Or has he? Oh, of course he hasn’t. Actually, Jaime’s armor temporarily killed him to avoid getting vaporized by Polaris’ magnetic attacks. The new strategy: flood Polaris’ body with gluons to, well, make him feel really sick. Luckily, Jaime has some allies, like Polaris’ estranged daughter, who stabs him with a plank of wood, and some of his former minions, who also lay a little smackdown on him. Oh, and Jaime’s got a proton cannon, too, so that’ll probably help. On top of all that, Brenda and Paco ponder whether they’re ready to start a relationship together, and Jaime puts some mass-media hurt on an ambitious politician’s political aspirations.

Verdict: Thumbs up. Definitely feels like a return-to-form for this title, with great one-liners, great action, great plot development, great characterization. Final issue coming up soon, but that doesn’t mean you can’t keep showing it some love.

The Goon #31

It’s the final battle against the horrific Labrazio and his minions. Labrazio shoots one of the orphans, and it looks like he’s got the Goon over the barrel, but Franky comes to the rescue. Meanwhile, Buzzard surprises the monstrous woky by figuring out an answer to his question. The Goon and Buzzard know how to stop Labrazio once and for all, but will they be able to enact their plan before the villains hurt more of the Goon’s friends?

Verdict: Thumbs up. Good gravy, what a thumbs up. Action galore, Labrazio’s secret revealed, a hopeless battle, a last-minute save, and a bit of last-page heartbreak to carry us home. Eric Powell has turned out one of the best comics of the past year right here. Go get this issue, go get the back issues, go get the collections.

Green Lantern #36

The Red Lanterns have Sinestro, with plans to torture him to death. Meanwhile, Fatality gets converted into the Star Sapphires, and the Green Lanterns get saved by a Blue Lantern, an alien who calls himself Saint Walker, whose ring is able to mega-charge Green Lantern power rings and provide hope and healing to anyone. Walker takes Hal Jordan to his home planet, where he meets Ganthet and Sayd, former Guardians who now run the Blue Lanterns. They tell him that they want him to become the leader of the Blue Lanterns.

Verdict: Thumbs down. The blood-puking Red Lanterns have gotten very tiresome, Saint Walker makes me want to hurt small children and puppies, and I’m no longer sure I can stand the creation of the Orange and Indigo Lanterns, much less the Black Lanterns.